Featured Author: Kelly Rimmer

"It’s one thing to have an intellectual debate about whether pregnant women who abuse drugs should face legal consequences and what those might be," says author Kelly Rimmer. it’s another thing altogether to step inside the world of a character and see the journey she has walked to arrive at a time in her life where she’s both expecting a much-loved child, and desperately addicted."

Kelly Rimmer lives in rural NSW with her family and her two 'fantastically naughty' dogs, Sully and Basil. She is the bestselling author of five novels, and Before I Let You Go will be the first of these to hit shelves in Australia and New Zealand.

The novel centres around the decision her main character, Lexie, must make about her addict sister, who has just given birth to a baby girl. As a doctor, Lexie must walk the line between her professional instincts and emotional ties to her beleaguered sister. 

The novel was inspired by Kelly's uncles struggles with addiction, and tangles with a US law that deems drug use during pregnancy a felony. Read the Q&A below to find out more about the research and inspiration behind Before I Let You Go.

ABOUT THE BOOK

 As children, Lexie and Annie were incredibly close. Bonded by the death of their beloved father, they weathered the storms of life together. When Lexie leaves home to follow her dream, Annie is forced to turn to her leather-bound journal as the only place she can confide her deepest secrets and fears...

As adults, sisters Lexie and Annie could not be more different. Lexie is a successful doctor and happily engaged. Annie is an addict - a thief, a liar and unable to remain clean. When Annie's newborn baby is in danger of being placed in foster care, Annie picks up the phone to beg her sister for help. Will Lexie agree to take in her young niece? And how will Annie survive, losing the only thing in her life worth living for?

AUTHOR Q&A

At the centre of Before I Let You Go is a tense moral dilemma that both your characters and the reader must tangle with. Should Lexie defend her sister’s right to motherhood, or allow authorities to remove the child from a potentially dangerous and unhealthy state of affairs? What inspired you to write a story about this choice?

I was inspired by my late uncle’s issues with substance abuse and his eventual overdose, so the original seed of an idea I had was just to explore the issue of addiction, however as soon as I started researching I became quite fascinated by the intersection of pregnancy, substance abuse and the justice system in the US.

For me, one of the very best things about both reading and writing fiction is the way it can help us to imagine someone else’s circumstances in quite a personal way. It’s one thing to have an intellectual debate about whether pregnant women who abuse drugs should face legal consequences and what those might be—it’s another thing altogether to step inside the world of a character and see the journey she has walked to arrive at a time in her life where she’s both expecting a much-loved child, and desperately addicted.

Is there a time you’ve been confronted with a similarly difficult decision, whether in real life or in fiction?

The closest I’ve come to confronting this kind of dilemma in the past was in writing one of my earlier novels, which dealt with 2 families impacted by forced adoption. I’m drawn to these kinds of scenarios in fiction both as a reader and a writer. The fictional world can act as a sandbox where we put our values and opinions to the test.

Some US states deem substance abuse during pregnancy a felony. What made you want to comment on the ramifications of this law?

The stigma around drug addiction is intense—but it’s never more intense than when a person with an addiction also happens to be a person who is pregnant. These laws are ostensibly enforced to protect infants, however in practice, achieve little more than to deter or even penalise pregnant women who would seek medical support. The way the justice system approaches cases like Annie’s presents a uniquely complex scenario, and to me, speaks to the sky-high expectations society commands of women, particularly once they become pregnant. 

"Addiction is difficult and messy, even for health professionals."

Lexie and her partner Sam are both medical professionals. How did you go about presenting the difficulty these characters experience in trying to reconcile their professional training with their personal emotions and instincts? 

In conducting my research, I interviewed health professionals about their experiences. While the people I interviewed were generally very quick to remind me that addiction is a medical and psychological issue, it was also very clear that treating substance abuse is not the same as treating the ‘flu – addiction is difficult and messy, even for health professionals. I wanted to capture that struggle in how I wrote the characters of Sam and Lexie. They are both doctors -  although they engage with Annie not as treating physicans, but as family members. The battle between how a health professional thinks about addiction and how they feel about addiction would never be more difficult than in those circumstances.

You say that you use research as a way of understanding things that bewilder you. How did your research into addiction shed light on the disease and change your understanding of it?

At least part of my motivation when planning to write a story about addiction was to learn and to better understand my uncle’s struggles, and why we lost him the way we did. I was trying to reconcile the reality that someone so loved and so loving could also behave in such hurtful and damaging ways. I certainly do feel like researching and writing this book has helped me to do that.

Annie is given voice throughout the story – even as she is locked away in a hospital room on heavy sedatives – through excerpts from her journal. Do you keep a journal? What made you decide to present Annie’s side of the story, and flashbacks to her childhood, in this way?

I journaled compulsively when I was in my teens and twenties. Every day I’d write in a A4 hardback journal as a way of practicing my writing craft and also as a method of self-reflection. I only stopped journaling when my children were born and my writing time became more limited - I had to save my energy for fiction! I think most writers keep a journal at some point, so it seemed natural to me that Annie (who is also an aspiring writer) would express herself in this way.

What fascinates you about motherhood and pregnancy?

I love writing about relationships of all kinds, but the bond between each mother and child is so unique and complex – often wonderful and special but at the same time, it can be layered and demanding. The links between individuals are fascinating to me – and trying to capture the intricacies of relationships in my stories is a challenge I can’t get enough of.

Why did you write this novel, and how do you hope people will engage with it? 

I hope that readers will get a sense of how complex the issue of substance abuse really is, and maybe, to become just a little more compassionate towards those who struggle with addiction and the family members and friends who love them.

Before I Let You Go  by Kelly Rimmer is published by Hachette, rrp $29.99.